"Cleetus Ferbderbler, Boy Improvisor, Drug Counselor"

Dear Everyone,

  My drug counseling group is getting a little unfocused---last evening, they talked about something called "goofballs" for over an hour.  At first, I thought they were being rude to me, but later figured out it was nothing personal.

  I've decided to give them a written quiz tonight.  Here is the quiz (please don't share with any known drug addicts, as that might give some of the junkies an unfair advantage).

1.  What is a "goofball?"
2.  How often do busses run to Humboldt Park?
3.  Why are drugs bad?
4.  A "spike" is:

• A baseball bat.
• A derogatory racial slur.
• A drug thingy.

Please write in 140 characters or less how grateful you are for these drug counseling sessions, and the free gourmet coffee.

Stay tuned for the educational results!