Sunday, July 7, 2013

Cleetus Ferbderbler, Boy Improvisor, Announces Terrifying Descent Into Drug Addiction

Dear Everyone,
  I'd like to announce my terrifying descent into drug addiction.

After our last show in Cairo (only fair; the audience seemed distracted), I collected my per diem---$1.65---and headed into the humid, but enticing Cairo evening.

Within moments!  I was in an OPIUM DEN, and "chasing the dragon" for all I was worth!

I have a few questions, however:

1.  When I return to the Midwest, are needles (or "spikes") included?
2.  Do the "dealers" (or "connections") take Discover?
3.  If I become a "dealer" myself, are my expenses fully deductible?

Stay tuned, everyone----soon this will be "Naked Lunch" meets "Teen Spirit" meets many many Billie Holiday songs!

So excited!

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